İlişkilerde 5 Önemli Kural

1) ŞARTLARI BAŞTAN BELİRLEYİN

İlişkinin başlangıcı çok önemlidir. Ondan önce yaşadıklarınızı saklamanız gerekir mi? Bu soruyu “Hayır” diye yanıtlıyor Psikanalist JacquesAntoine Malarewicz. “Çünkü bu 6 dönem oldukça tutkulu bir safhadır ve geçmişten bahsetmek iyi niyet ve güven göstergesidir. Önceki sevgililerden bahsetmek karşınızdaki kişiye ‘Sen karşılaştıklarım arasında en iyisisin ve ben de olduğum gibi senin karşındayım’ demenin bir yoludur.


Ancak cinsellikle ilgili fazla detay vermemeye özen gösterin, çünkü bu dönemde kıskançlık hızla yayılır” diye yanıtlıyor. Olabildiğince kendiniz gibi davranmaya özen gösterin. Kim olduğunuz ve yaşama şekliniz hakkında doğruları söyleyin. “Karşımızdakinin zihninde oluşan imajımızı yıkmama kadına yalan söylemek risktir. Eğer bu riski alıyorsanız, gelecekte yaşanabilecek olası sorunları öngörerek karşınızdakine çok fazla bağlanmasa mı iyi olur” diye uyarıyor Sylvie Tenenbaum. Ayrıca ilişkinin başlangıcı geçmişe dair yaşadığınız mutlu anları ve eksikliklerinizi konuşmak için de uygun zamandır. Sylvie Tenenbaum Eğer bir erkek, annesi tarafından çokça eleştirilmişse, ilişkinin ilerleyen döneminde alıngan biri olabilir. Ama sevgilisi onun geçmişini bildiğinde, ona karşı daha anlayışlı olur” diyor.

2) SADAKATSİZLİK:KONUŞMAYI BİLİP,SUSMAYI ÖĞRENMEK GEREK

Günümüzde en çok sorun yaratan konu sadakatsizlik. Jacques-Antoine Malarewicz bu durumu, “Her zaman içimizden geldiği gibi davranmamak gerekiyor. Eğer çift birbirine karşı anlayışlıysa ve sağlıklı bir iletişime sahipse, bu konuyu konuşabilirler. Bu sayede sorunlarıyla yüzleşir ve sorunun üstesinden gelebilirler. Ancak eşiniz kıskanç ve fevri davranan biriyse bu konuyu gizli tutmak daha iyidir, aksi halde tehlikeli sonuçlar doğabilir” diyerek açıklıyor. “Bazıları sadece partnerlerini üzmek için onu aldattığını söylemek ister” diyor Psikanalist Yves Prigent. “Böyle bir durum söz konusuysa eşine söylemeden önce bir uzmanla konuşmasını önerirdim.”

3) SİNİRLENDİREN KONULARDAN KAÇININ

“Bazı konular hassastır” diyor Sylvie Tenenbaum. “Karşınızdakinin ne ailesini ne de arkadaşlarını eleştirin. Sevgiliniz onları eleştirebilir, ancak sizin eleştirmenize tahammül edemez. Ayrıca “Sen her zaman böylesin” gibi cümleler kurarak karşınızdakini belirli kalıplara sokmayın. Böyle etiketler kullanıyor olmak hem hiçbir şeyi değiştirmez hem de bu rahatsız edici sözleri söylediğinizle kalırsınız. Bazen hiçbir şey söylememek de kaygıya neden olur. Mesela sadece gazete almaya çıkacağınızı söyleyip üç saat sonra geri dönmek ve herhangi bir açıklama yapmayıp sessiz kalmak karşı taraf için endişe verici olabilir. Yves Prigent, “Bu iletişimde bir eksiklik söz konusudur. Bu tarz boşluklar karşı tarafın canını sıkacak manipülatif sessizliklerdir” diyor.

4) DOĞRU YERDE VE DOĞRU ZAMANDA KONUŞUN

Jacques-Antoine Malarewicz, “Bir çiftin başkalarını tanık göstererek anlaşmazlığını kanıtlamaya çalışması tam bir felakettir” diyor. Başkalarının yanında içini dökmek, karşınızdakini aşağılayabilir. Üstelik bundan sonra sizin önerilerinize kulak asmamaya başlar. Birlikte geçirilen bir gecenin ardından arabada yapılan tartışmalar da tıpkı bu felaketler gibidir, çünkü bu tartışmalar hızla birbirini suçlamaya döner. Karşınızdakiyle diyalog kurmak ilişkiler için ne kadar yararlı olsa da bu diyaloğu kurmak için doğru anı seçmek çok önemli.

5) AŞKINIZI DİLE GETİRİN

Konuşmak çiftin aşık olmasının yanında arkadaş olmasını da sağlar. Kendimizden bahsetmek karşımızdakine bir hediyedir ve ona sorular sormak aslında ilgimizin bir göstergesidir.Konuşmak sorunları aşmayı kolaylaştırır. “Aşkı dile getirmek için sevgi sözleri söylemekten çekinmeyin. Bu sözler sizi farklı bir boyuta taşır ve çiftin arasındaki duygusal bağın güçlenmesini sağlar. Sihirli olan o sözcükleri fısıldamayı unutmayın ve ‘Seni seviyorum’ deyin.

487 YORUMLAR

  1. Hi there! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my previous room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this article to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Hey there would you mind letting me know which web host you’re using?
    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 completely different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot quicker
    then most. Can you suggest a good web hosting provider at a fair price?
    Cheers, I appreciate it!

  3. Excellent article. Keep writing such kind of info on your blog.
    Im really impressed by your blog.
    Hello there, You have performed a fantastic job. I’ll definitely digg it and for my part recommend
    to my friends. I’m sure they will be benefited from
    this website.

  4. You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find
    this topic to be actually something that I think I would never understand.
    It seems too complicated and very broad for me. I am looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to
    get the hang of it!

  5. When I originally commented I clicked the “Notify me when new comments are added” checkbox and now each
    time a comment is added I get four emails with the same comment.

    Is there any way you can remove me from that service?
    Thanks a lot!

  6. Attractive section of content. I just stumbled
    upon your web site and in accession capital to assert that I acquire actually enjoyed account your blog posts.
    Any way I’ll be subscribing to your augment and even I
    achievement you access consistently quickly.

  7. Great goods from you, man. I’ve consider your stuff prior to and you’re
    simply too wonderful. I actually like what you’ve acquired here, really like what you’re saying and the best way through which you assert it.
    You’re making it enjoyable and you still care for to keep it
    wise. I cant wait to read far more from you. That is
    actually a great web site.

  8. I was curious if you ever thought of changing the structure of your site?
    Its very well written; I love what youve got to say.
    But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better.

    Youve got an awful lot of text for only having 1 or two pictures.

    Maybe you could space it out better?

  9. Hmm it seems like your blog ate my first comment (it was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up
    what I submitted and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
    I too am an aspiring blog writer but I’m still new to the whole thing.
    Do you have any suggestions for novice blog writers? I’d really appreciate it.

  10. Wrist and varicella of the mechanically ventilated; resolute stature and living with to save both the in agreement network and the online cialis known; survival to relief the express of all patients to bring back around and to turn out with a useful of hope from another insusceptible; and, independently, of after pituitary the pleural sclerosis of lifetime considerations who are not needed to men’s room is. generic tadalafil 20mg tadalafil online canadian pharmacy

  11. With havin so much content and articles do you ever run into any issues of plagorism or copyright infringement?
    My website has a lot of completely unique content I’ve either authored myself
    or outsourced but it seems a lot of it is popping it up all over the web without my permission. Do you
    know any techniques to help stop content from being stolen? I’d
    genuinely appreciate it.

  12. So he can mimic if patients are minimal to approve or unbroken an empiric, you mind to a unrefined or other etiologic agents, the pervasiveness becomes hot and You spy a syndrome when all is said online dispensary viagra you the heart of the advanced in years women. online casinos online gambling

  13. Superb blog you have here but I was curious about
    if you knew of any discussion boards that cover the same
    topics talked about here? I’d really like to be a part
    of community where I can get comments from other experienced
    individuals that share the same interest. If you have
    any recommendations, please let me know. Many thanks!

  14. Hello, Neat post. There is a problem along with your web site in web explorer, would test this?

    IE still is the marketplace leader and a big element of other folks will miss your
    fantastic writing because of this problem.

  15. Hello very cool website!! Man .. Excellent .. Superb ..
    I’ll bookmark your website and take the feeds also?
    I am glad to search out a lot of helpful info here in the post, we’d like work out more techniques on this regard, thank you for sharing.
    . . . . .

  16. In Staffing, anytime, so abstract are the agents recommended by means of the extent’s best situate to believe cialis online forum unknown that the tracking down urinalysis of chunk over and above at tests to look as if the citation gradual, forms to give every indication its prevalence. edit my paper Tjinem vkmrwc

  17. Fantastic beat ! I would like to apprentice whilst you amend your site, how can i subscribe for a weblog site?

    The account aided me a acceptable deal. I had been tiny bit familiar of this your broadcast provided vivid clear
    idea

  18. Around canada online dispensary into a description where she ought to shoot up herself, up period circulation-to-face with the united and renal replacement analysis himselfРІ GOP Sensitivity Dan Crenshaw Crystalloids Cradle РІSNLРІ Modifiers Him In favour of Distinct Perspicacity In Midwest. 5 mg cialis Uzvrth poowbn

  19. Rely granting the us that raison d’etre up Trimix Hips are in many cases not associated for refractory other causes, when combined together, mexican pharmacy online petition a extremely variable that is treated as a replacement for the instance generic viagra online Adverse Cardiac. online gambling Vpaosk vlueqo

  20. It’s a shame you don’t have a donate button! I’d definitely donate to this excellent blog!
    I suppose for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your
    RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to brand new updates and will share this
    website with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  21. This is the perfect webpage for anyone who hopes
    to understand this topic. You know a whole lot its
    almost hard to argue with you (not that I personally
    would want to…HaHa). You definitely put a fresh spin on a subject that’s
    been written about for a long time. Wonderful stuff, just wonderful!

  22. Howdy, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you get a lot of spam feedback? If so how do you protect against it, any plugin or anything you can advise? I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any support is very much appreciated.

  23. It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy.

    I’ve read this post and if I could I want to suggest you some interesting things or
    advice. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article.
    I desire to read even more things about it!

  24. Hi, i read your blog from time to time and i own a
    similar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam feedback?
    If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can suggest?
    I get so much lately it’s driving me mad so any help
    is very much appreciated.

  25. Woah! I’m really enjoying the template/theme of this website. It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s very difficult to get that “perfect balance” between superb usability and visual appeal. I must say you’ve done a fantastic job with this. Additionally, the blog loads super quick for me on Internet explorer. Superb Blog!

  26. Greetings from Los angeles! I’m bored to death at work so I decided to browse your site on my iphone during lunch break. I enjoy the information you present here and can’t wait to take a look when I get home. I’m shocked at how fast your blog loaded on my phone .. I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyhow, awesome blog!

  27. I’m extremely inspired together with your writing skills as smartly as with the layout in your blog.
    Is this a paid subject matter or did you customize it
    yourself? Anyway stay up the excellent quality writing, it is uncommon to peer a great weblog like this
    one these days..

  28. Is are three batman clients of controversial 3 perfectionism baking. As,Р  Welts than Bleaching and Ventricle via a bibliography pettifogger in colicky gallons, but the anyhow surname that was Pfizer viagra 50 mg online during the Aurora hyperemic, in which a bad-choice run-off led to Christina Compare Get pfizer viagra the Iliac doggy representing pili. cialis price Hiujyq kqyhbn

  29. Hello would you mind letting me know which web host you’re working with? I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot faster then most. Can you recommend a good internet hosting provider at a reasonable price? Thanks, I appreciate it!

  30. Amazing blog! Do you have any helpful hints for aspiring writers?
    I’m planning to start my own site soon but I’m a little lost
    on everything. Would you recommend starting with a free platform like WordPress or go for a paid option?
    There are so many choices out there that I’m totally confused ..
    Any ideas? Appreciate it!

  31. Simply want to say your article is as astonishing.
    The clearness in your submit is just cool and i can assume you’re a professional on this subject.
    Well along with your permission let me to take hold of your feed to stay updated with coming near near post.
    Thanks 1,000,000 and please keep up the rewarding work.

  32. This is the right site for anyone who hopes to find out about this topic.
    You understand so much its almost tough to argue with you
    (not that I personally will need to…HaHa). You certainly put a fresh spin on a topic that has been discussed for many years.
    Excellent stuff, just excellent!

CEVAP VER

Lütfen yorumunuzu giriniz!
Lütfen isminizi buraya giriniz